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The Big Fella comes through again


When Sue and I first started talking about what had happened in the backyard that night in May of 2008 I couldn’t give her the details. I hadn’t been there. We had to ask Ken and I was a little concerned about that. I wanted to tell my story but Ken doesn’t necessarily want to tell his.


I have to say Ken has been amazing through this process. This is not something he wanted to relive and we were asking him to tell us everything about that night, blow by blow, to the best of his recollection. Remember, we were asking him to recall 15 minutes that happened almost 14 years ago. That alone was hard for Ken. I don't know about you but often I can’t remember why I walked into a room, never mind recall detailed memories of a highly stressful event 14 years ago.


The great thing is Ken has an amazing memory. He was so patient with our questions and gave us so much information about that night. He shared how he felt and walked us through every step he took.

Because I had never been up the driveway or in the backyard of that house on Betula Place I had a different idea in my mind of Ken and Kenny walking up the stairs into the backyard. It wasn’t until Ken actually drew us a picture of how the driveway looks, where the stairs are situated and the elevation of the house and the levels and sight lines.


Then I understood how crazy it was to all of a sudden be faced with a man, incoherent, spewing half sentences, brandishing a gun and saying he was going to kill you.


I could see in my mind Ken trying to get his head behind a two by four post and within a few seconds trying to decide “do I run down the stairs and get a bullet in the back?” or “do I try to get the gun?”


This was such a hard thing for Ken to relive. He has tried to heal and I think talking about this in depth has really brought it to the surface for him So I gotta say once again “the big fella” as he is affectionately known, has put me and my healing before how he feels.


Thank you Ken!


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